Longing or Lethargic? (Titus 2:11-14 (LD 24; Head 5 Art. 12)

One of the basic accusations against the Reformed faith is basically along the lines that if we make grace too free or too gracious then people will be lethargic in the Christian life.  Is this true?  How can a free grace view of redemption account for Paul’s letter to Titus where he exhorts us to train ourselves in godliness?  How can we account for all men being saved?  How can a system that believes that God’s grace is only applied to the God’s chosen elect account for Paul’s language of training and stating all being saved?